O my soul,
Do you think you have understood what the Lord is doing in your life?
I suspect your level of understanding may be far less than you have thought. Consider Mary, hearing from the angel Gabriel standing right in front of her and speaking plainly.
And the angel said to her, “Do not be afraid, Mary, for you have found favour with God. And behold, you will conceive in your womb and bear a son, and you shall call his name Jesus. He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High. And the Lord God will give to him the throne of his father David, and he will reign over the house of Jacob forever, and of his kingdom there will be no end.”
And Mary said to the angel, “How will this be, since I am a virgin?”
― Luke 1:30-34
What a lot for her to take in! What did she actually understand? The most confronting element was surely that even as a virgin she would be having a baby, and this was evidently foremost in her mind. How much do you think she understood about the rest⸺who he would be and what he would do? At this point in the story we cannot know.
Shortly afterwards her relative Elizabeth reminded her of what she had been told and affirmed her in it.
And Elizabeth was filled with the Holy Spirit, and she exclaimed …
“… And blessed is she who believed that there would be a fulfillment of what was spoken to her from the Lord.”
― Luke 1:41b-42a, 45
Who wouldn’t need to be reminded of what the Lord had said, and to be affirmed in receiving and believing it? O my soul, you must not neglect to remind of and to affirm in such things.
And perhaps solely because of this affirmation and encouragement from Elizabeth was Mary able to go to the next level in understanding this impossible thing the Lord would do in her life.
And Mary said, “My soul magnifies the Lord, and my spirit rejoices in God my Saviour, for he has looked on the humble estate of his servant. For behold, from now on all generations will call me blessed; for he who is mighty has done great things for me, and holy is his name.”
― Luke 1:46-49
Here we can see Mary just beginning to come to terms with the magnitude of what the Lord was doing in her and through her.
But she was still just beginning and her understanding was still so partial. Consider what happened on the night of Jesus’ birth.
And in the same region there were shepherds out in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night. And an angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were filled with great fear. And the angel said to them, “Fear not, for behold, I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, who is Christ the Lord. And this will be a sign for you: you will find a baby wrapped in swaddling cloths and lying in a manger.” And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God and saying, “Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace among those with whom he is pleased!”
When the angels went away from them into heaven, the shepherds said to one another, “Let us go over to Bethlehem and see this thing that has happened, which the Lord has made known to us.” And they went with haste and found Mary and Joseph, and the baby lying in a manger. And when they saw it, they made known the saying that had been told them concerning this child. And all who heard it wondered at what the shepherds told them. But Mary treasured up all these things, pondering them in her heart.
― Luke 2:8-19
The word translated ponder here can mean combine, or come together, or confer with oneself. This was the third miraculous revelation, and Mary was still piecing things together.
And it continued beyond this.
And when the time came for their purification according to the Law of Moses, they brought him up to Jerusalem to present him to the Lord.
Now there was a man in Jerusalem, whose name was Simeon, and this man was righteous and devout, waiting for the consolation of Israel, and the Holy Spirit was upon him. And it had been revealed to him by the Holy Spirit that he would not see death before he had seen the Lord’s Christ. And he came in the Spirit into the temple, and when the parents brought in the child Jesus, to do for him according to the custom of the Law, he took him up in his arms and blessed God and said, “Lord, now you are letting your servant depart in peace, according to your word; for my eyes have seen your salvation that you have prepared in the presence of all peoples, a light for revelation to the Gentiles, and for glory to your people Israel.”
And his father and his mother marvelled at what was said about him.
― Luke 2:22, 25-33
Now there have been four instances of miraculous revelation and still Mary is marvelling.
She couldn’t know yet but more than thirty years would pass before she would step up two more truly momentous levels in understanding, one heartbreaking and one joyous.
So they took Jesus, and he went out, bearing his own cross, to the place called The Place of a Skull, which in Aramaic is called Golgotha. There they crucified him, and with him two others, one on either side, and Jesus between them.
Standing by the cross of Jesus were his mother and his mother’s sister, Mary the wife of Clopas, and Mary Magdalene.
― John 19:16b-18, 25
Was Mary remembering those previous revelations? The hope and the joy of the world? Surely Simeon’s words spoken at Jesus’ dedication in the temple would have come flooding back.
And Simeon blessed them and said to Mary his mother, “Behold, this child is appointed for the fall and rising of many in Israel, and for a sign that is opposed (and a sword will pierce through your own soul also), so that thoughts from many hearts may be revealed.”
― Luke 2:34-35
Surely was her own soul pierced on this darkest of days. But something more was to be revealed to Jesus’ disciples just days later after his glorious resurrection, and we can presume that Mary too climbed to that joyous level of understanding.
Then he opened their minds to understand the Scriptures, and said to them, “Thus it is written, that the Christ should suffer and on the third day rise from the dead, and that repentance for the forgiveness of sins should be proclaimed in his name to all nations, beginning from Jerusalem.”
― Luke 24:45-47
So what may we conclude from Mary’s journey of incremental understanding, beginning with the angel standing before her and speaking plainly, and steadily increasing over a period of more than thirty years? O my soul, do not presume to think you have just now any more than a partial understanding of what the Lord is doing in your own life.
Learn to surrender in praise and awe and wonder along with the Apostle Paul.
Oh, the depth of the riches and wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are his judgments and how inscrutable his ways!
― Romans 11:33
The reality is richer and deeper in every way, and will be revealed step by step as you trust and submit yourself to the Lord’s will with rejoicing in ever increasing surrender.
And know that understanding is not as necessary as perhaps you had thought.
Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
― Philippians 4:6-7
There is one more thing to know, and to hold on to in the inevitable and ongoing state of your own partial understanding, and that is that the Lord’s understanding is not partial. He knows and he understands and he is good beyond our own understanding, and that is enough.
For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.
― Jeremiah 29:11
And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.
― Romans 8:28
O my soul, in humility and surrender know and accept that your own understanding is partial, so rest in these plans and purposes of the Lord and in his unfathomable peace! 🙏