O my soul,

Is it simply too hard to forgive your accusers for their whispered lies against you? For the way they have crushed you from the shadows? For the way they have acted in blatant disregard for Jesus’ teaching?

What is that teaching?

“If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother.”

― Matthew 18:15

Of course they did not do that. Whatever offence they allege you have committed against them, rather than seek reconciliation as Jesus commanded, instead they have held on to their own hurt, nurturing it and tending to it until it established itself as bitterness and resentment, until it became a grudge, fueling their whispering against you in the shadows.

So what now? How will you respond? Interestingly Jesus moves straight on to the parable of the unmerciful servant.

Then Peter came up and said to him, “Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?” Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times.

“Therefore the kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who wished to settle accounts with his servants.”

― Matthew 18:21-23

The parable is familiar, and links our own forgiveness of others with our Heavenly Father’s forgiveness of us. It is the same in the Lord’s Prayer.

Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.

For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.

― Matthew 6:12, 14-15

The link between our own forgiveness of others and the Lord’s forgiveness of our own trespasses is stark.

But isn’t this forgiveness too hard? Too painful? Are you expected simply to absorb that pain and the hurt they have caused you, as if it doesn’t matter?

Of course it matters! It matters terribly! It is grievous. So what to do?

You must recognise that you are being tempted. You are being tempted by the Father of Lies, to hold on to your own hurt, nurturing it and tending to it just as your accusers must have done with theirs.

Again I find the juxtaposition of passages in the Bible to be so revealing. For not only do we have here in Matthew Chapter 18 the teaching on reconciliation followed immediately by the parable of the unmerciful servant, but what do we find Jesus teaching just before this?

“Woe to the world for temptations to sin! For it is necessary that temptations come, but woe to the one by whom the temptation comes!”

― Matthew 18:7

Temptation here means stumbling block. It is necessary that stumbling blocks come. Necessary? How can this be necessary? Let’s apply this to your own temptation to withhold forgiveness for your accusers.

Then Peter came up and said to him, “Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?” Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times.”

― Matthew 18:21-22

Luke records Jesus as saying the same thing, but here the emphasis on the ongoing need to forgive is even stronger.

“Pay attention to yourselves! If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him, and if he sins against you seven times in the day, and turns to you seven times, saying, ‘I repent,’ you must forgive him.”

― Luke 17:3-4

Seven times in a day! And the next day likely the same. Doesn’t this test the limits of forgiveness? But isn’t that exactly the point? Those limits must be exposed and then removed. There can be no limit here.

Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.

― Colossians 3:12-13

As the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.

When did you last need forgiveness from the Lord? Was it not today? And has today’s count reached seven, or are you in truth far beyond that? And the day before? And tomorrow? O my soul, you do know what I’m talking about!

As the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.

Indeed, under the law almost everything is purified with blood, and without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness of sins.

― Hebrews 9:22

And when they came to the place that is called The Skull, there they crucified him, and the criminals, one on his right and one on his left. And Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.”⁠

― Luke 23:33-34

There is a cost to forgiveness and it is enormous. Jesus paid the price, and even as he was paying that price, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.”

And so too there is a cost for you to forgive and it is more than pain. Something has to die. What is that something? It is that spirit which demands to justify your own position. It is that spirit which desires to fight back. It is that spirit which would take all of your own pain and hurt and return it in kind. It is pride.

Repudiate that spirit of pride.

As the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.”

Put to death the pride that stands in the way of forgiveness. It is painful for sure. But know that the biggest pain sensor in the human body is called the ego. Put it to death. Make it your sacrifice of forgiveness to the Lord.

And notice what Paul commanded must be put on.

Put on then … humility, … , forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.

― Colossians 3:12-13

So why are these stumbling blocks so necessary? These temptations to withhold forgiveness? Because how can we do a thing without first learning how to do it? And how can we learn without doing it again, and again. And over again. Seven times in a day. More than seven. Seventy seven times. Seventy times seven.

Do not overlook that seven symbolises perfection. Your forgiveness must be perfect. So keep practising! It is necessary that you do.

Two last points.

Paul writes,

Anyone whom you forgive, I also forgive. Indeed, what I have forgiven, if I have forgiven anything, has been for your sake in the presence of Christ, so that we would not be outwitted by Satan; for we are not ignorant of his designs.

― 2 Corinthians 2:10-11

Satan is constantly at work drip-feeding his poison into the ears of believers. Forgiveness is such a powerful weapon to neutralise this. May we not be ignorant of his designs.

And finally and most importantly,

On the evening of that day, the first day of the week, the doors being locked where the disciples were for fear of the Jews, Jesus came and stood among them and said to them, “Peace be with you.” When he had said this, he showed them his hands and his side. Then the disciples were glad when they saw the Lord. Jesus said to them again, “Peace be with you. As the Father has sent me, even so I am sending you.” And when he had said this, he breathed on them and said to them, “Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven them; if you withhold forgiveness from any, it is withheld.”

― John 20:19-23

Tremble at the responsibility you have been given. If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven them; if you withhold forgiveness from any, it is withheld.

O my soul, forgiveness is Kingdom work. Will you do it? 🙏